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"It's a difficult thing balancing entertainment and musical integrity. Many top DJs are backed into a corner musically and forced to play a style or genre and eventually trap themselves. I once heard Paul Oakenfold play hip hop (very well too!) and asked him why he played trance when he was clearly capable of playing anything. He replied mournfully that it was expected of him, people pay to get what they want." Tim Sheridan.

With this in mind two of Ibiza's biggest stars have got together to murder this notion in cold blood. We were milling around just after a great DC10 session when this wide eyed energetic beanpole springs up and stuffs a flyer in our hands. Not another flyer. I glanced at it in the car, NASTYDIRTYSEXMUSIC it said and that was all, apart from a map. It was enough. We were off. We were still laughing and joking about the name half an hour later. One hour later we were not laughing. We were too out of our minds to read a menu, never mind go orienteering with a map and compass. Just when it started to get boring we tried the Zen-navigation method. This involves finding a car full of people who look as mental as you and following them. Sure enough we drove past Pacha and got to Talamanca beach. We'd driven past it 4 times already!

Once on the beach we walked up to the other end and found the cutest looking beach bar I've seen. "this can't be it" one said "it's all cuddly and is called 'Ciao Rosina', that's not very nasty or dirty". As we got to the place we started to hear why it was called that. There was a grinding and gurning gaggle of beached mongs out the front, one of them swivelled a lizard eye at me and said "it's fucking ace" we took his word and went in.

There was a nice number of punters, not too busy, not too sparse, the drinks weren't cheap, but not expensive, the surroundings were rough but not unpleasantly so. It's just the music is the best I've heard played in Ibiza in 10 years of coming here. To put it quite simply, the music is nasty, it certainly is dirty and absolutely about sex, no doubt about it. We thought it was a clever gimmick name, it turns out it's just a description of the night.

It's the brainchild of Jockey Slut writer, ex-Manumission resident, former London Underground star Tim Sheridan and International Superstar Smokin Jo. What are they doing here, playing back to back on an unknown beach....for FREE?? I shouted questions at them but they were totally in the Zone. I've seen them both play a lot but they were pure concentration. I collared Tim in the Bogs and asked a few key ones...

Tim, what's nastydirtysexmusic all about?
"It's pretty simple, Jo and I play an awful lot but don't always get to do what we want. We basically work for other people, playing tunes that people want, to make them dance. This is just me and Jo playing what we love, for us, for no profit. I used the phrase 'Nastydirtysexmusic' to describe certain types of records to Jo as a laugh. We started to realise we had the same taste in certain areas. That what we called 'nastydirtyrecords' were the BEST (I should point out that Tim is the only person I've interviewed who speaks in capital letters sometimes!) records. So we even started to produce our own tracks in this way. Eventually we had a large body of work and records. It was really exciting because it felt like we were starting our own little genre.

What constitutes a Nastydirtyrecord then?
Well...(thinks for a very long time) It's like when the bass kicks in and it makes you produce a face, not a gurn but you see people reacting to a tune and they're face is going "yeeees". THAT is it. Ewan Pearson makes nastydirty. Radio Slave is definitively Nasty, no question. Jon Carter makes nastydirtymusic. Danny Tenaglia plays some, sometimes. DC10 gets the vibe too, particularly Clive Henry. It's NOT the usual old house music you hear all over now. SOME electro can be nastydirty but not often. Basically everybody who comes here says 'I get it, this is nastydirtysexmusic'. I mean, I WOULD say that wouldn't I? (laughs) but more than a few people have said that to me, so I'm inclined to believe it. I've started to believe our own hype! but look around you. This is no superclub (laughs), I've been the resident for many superclubs (Home London, Space, Manumission etc ) we are very exited about the music but that's where it ends. We are not making money from this so we can't pay for hype.

It's very surprising to see a star as big as Smokin Jo in a place like this
Jo is a surprising person. she has been around as long as any of the big stars, longer in most cases. But I think, and I might be going out on a limb here, that as she is a woman. A very beautiful woman. People tend see that first. I used to see her play at Trade when she was bald! That place is very under-rated in my opinion. Again, people think of Trade and think "Gay Club", but it wasn't at all. I mean it WAS! but a lot more. Every London club and bar worker ended up there after work on Sunday. It was incredibly mixed and the Music reflected that. It was not hard and all 'Tony de Vit'. It was eclectic and very special and very Smokin' Jo for a long time. I've seen Jo play a lot and I am a VERY stern critic of DJs. I'm a musician and I see DJing as something very easy to do compared to other aspects of music, but I respect people who do it well. Many Djs like Danny Rampling will agree that Jo is technically and musically a world class DJ who is better than many Djs who are more 'famous'. What REALLY pisses me off is even to this day, people come up to me and say "WOW, Jo is really good" as if they are fucking SURPRISED! I mean, how the fuck do they think she got to be where she is? a winning smile?! I get that a bit too. Because I have always been a resident and not a superstar (we have to remind Tim he was quite famous in the UK but he chooses to forget it) people often come up and say "who are you?" and I try to say "does it really matter?"

You made a bit of a splash on the island by being the first to do Electro, for Manumission. I read you were their first new resident in 4 years or something?
"That didn't last very long!! I have to say although I am biased, I thought Manumission was the success story of last season. I want to say CATAGORICALLY that I am NOT an Electro DJ! I like some Electro records but anyone who's heard me knows I play in every style, as long as it's good I'll play it. I hate labels and genres. HAh!~ just contradicted myself! I'm trying to build a new genre with nastdirty! I'm an idiot! Yeah, Manumission. They were by far the most adventurous club musically, which is ironic seeing as you would really expect certain other clubs to be more up to date with music.... It's frustrating a bit because in the winter I played a Pacha with 'What's Up?" to a thousand people and all night people are coming up and saying they really loved the Manumission Music Box and it was their favourite bit but they had no idea who I am. Manumission don't publicise their DJs. It's bad when customers are like that, but I got promoters coming up to me and saying 'I loved the music box, I've been trying to find you to book you but I didn't know who you were!' this is VERY frustrating sometimes. Colin Peters is one of the best DJs in the world but because he works for Manumission nobody knows this. Great for Manumission, bad for Colin. It's hard at Manumission, they have vision but don't think their success is tied into their DJs, they are right only up to a point. I have to say I think Andy Mackay is one the best promoters in the world. Actually it was Dawn who got me into Manumission..."

You said it didn't last long?
"No, I'm not a resident this season. Last season was awsome but the new curfew from the Consell of 7am has played havoc with schedules. I personally think it's crazy to empty all the clubs of dangerous drivers and put them on terrible roads all at once. Really, it's insane. Show me the fucking logic in that because I can't see it! Sorry! anyway! Manumission right? To my mind a resident DJ is something like what I did for Darren Hughes and his Home/Homelands/We Love thing. That was the perfect job for me. Myself and Steve Lawler were residents for Darren. We were the consistency of the night. The guest was terrible, we brought it back up. If the guest was good, we had a better time of it. To me a resident ends the night so you know people leave happy. Manumission don't want me to play at the end of the night in the Music Box, they want me to play first in the main room! not my thing at all. I have to quote the legendary Dave Beer here. He is the best promoter in the world for my money. He said that when things get good go smaller, not bigger. And you should always have a venue smaller than your expected turnout, there is always a queue and always an atmosphere. That's what we're doing here on the beach.

What else are you doing on the Island?
"Not much (laughs), without Manumission I have to travel to get that sort of level of job. I'd love to get another high profile residency on the island but I'm not sure if other clubs will risk my style. They tend to go for names and styles that people are familiar with, I'm more about new music. I play very new music and about 50% is unreleased and probably never will be. Also it's a bit late to be negotiating deals. I'm very happy with nastydirty but I would like it to be bigger, a little bit bigger. We have taken the concept to 'La Diosa' working with Zenith on Sundays. The underground room there is perfect for our sound. To me, an amazing club like my favourite ; 'Back to Basics' is based on simplicity. A square dark room, good soundsystem and amazing tunes. Simple as that. To me La Diosa is a challenge, if that room works this summer it will be the best room on the island. We just have to hope. I walked into La Diosa for their debut opening last year and I thought, WOW, this place could be the best thing on the island, it has the most potential. It's just people are a bit lazy, as I am and it's a bit of a journey. If you get up to Santa Gertrudis it's worth it. The venue is awesome. I try very hard to be involved with new things. Old stuff bores me. I only have to go somewhere once and if it's no good I'll never go again. I truly believe that Ibiza is not immune or immortal. It thinks collectively that it will never die. One day things will change and so fast people will be millionaires one day and paupers the next, standing around scratching their heads wondering when they should have changed with the times. People will go somewhere out of habit for a very long time but when people start to get pissed off and bored they dissappear very quickly."

...At this point Tim departs to join Jo on the decks. What he says is true. The music IS (in his capital letters) different and new. Most of it I've never heard before, when I do recognise a tune, it is a blinder that sits exactly in this style, like 'Kenny Hawkes' "Dance For Me". Suddenly you realise this 'nastydirtything' was always there, just waiting to be named.

Nastydirtysexmusic is at 'Ciao Rosina' on Talamanca beach at 9pm till 3am on Mondays. Also at La Diosa on occasional Sundays, wait for an invitation.
For information on these events call Joe (spanish and english) on +34 647047350.

Photo report by Manu Fernández